There’s something lately in the midst of flirtation, infatuation, and love that’s caught my attention. Some self-examination leads me to think that in order for us to move from flirtation to infatuation, we have to find something about this person in our gaze impressive.
It feels uncomfortably narcissistic at first, but I genuinely don’t think it is. How can I become infatuated with someone if nothing about them piques my curiosity? And I’ve mentioned before that curiosity is a form of love, or at the very least, care. Understanding comes from that, which leads to appreciation, which I would think, leads to love.
Testing that I’m not the first to have this thought, some research for similar notions proves to have results in the form of
“There was a pause. I was still scared by every gap in our conversation, fearing that this was it, the point where we had nothing left to say. I was still trying to impress you, and I still wanted to be impressed by you, so I could pass along pieces of your impressiveness to my friends, convincing myself this was possible.”
But I don’t think these things need to be major to be impressive. In fact, I think the simplest of things can be the most impressive. A simple combination of shared interests, even.
Additionally, I think one of the most impressive things is when the other person shows that they’re impressed or interested in us. An expression of contentment in your company, even, can light a match. It’s level of vulnerability that we share when we show curiosity. Most don’t seem to want to show this though, as ‘chill’ continues and a lack of passion is regarded as desirable. (I still wholly disagree with this though; I’m far too passionate a person to be interested in someone who is entirely ~chill~ and has no passion for anything in their life or me. It’s dreadfully boring, actually. Why would you want someone to care about you who cares so little about their life before you? Ew.)*
*(The TL;DR of that paragraph is: why would you be excited about someone who has so little to be excited about in their own life? What can you be excited about, about them?)
I hope someone can be impressed by my random passions for things. My overexcitement in a bookstore. My joy in being a thoughtful gift-giver. My competitive spirit, and willingness to talk trash even if I have no idea what I’m doing, just because it’s fun. I hope these things, among others, are enough for a mutual, positive impression.
The overall TL;DR is that you don’t have to be crazily impressive to impress someone. With how rare it seems to be, being comfortable with your passionate side and expressing yourself with honesty is the most impressive thing anyone can muster.
And I hope I find that in someone. Or maybe I already have. Who knows?
But I’d hate to get ahead of myself.